As we mentioned several months ago, there have been some changes in nomenclature for work-study positions for the coming year.

Along with Bake Crew becoming known as “Early Risers”, Flex becoming the “Superflex Superteam” and Sunday Crew becoming merely, and perhaps utmostly more properly, “Ruthie’s Family”, there are several new positions also opened up this year for students in the program to apply for as this above document leaked in advance of publication from the Student Life Office suggests.

A “Geology Assistant” will preserve, guard, care for, and defend Dr. Grove’s rock collection, a “Political Activities Director” will formalize many of the functions Anthony Jones is currently performing gratis for the school as well, as it is rumored, running a forthcoming a political action committee to be known as WCCPAC, while “Bouncers”, long rumored, will “protect the school in an increasingly hostile and dangerous environment” as minutes from a school board meeting approving funding for the new positions declared among other new positions outlined in the document.

Official information will be forthcoming once the school officially puts out the document publically and is able to discuss these positions more, but the upcoming year sees “unheard of and wild ideas” according to IIT staff member and WCC junior Sophia Donaldson, an expert on the program herself. “We’re looking at some weird stuff. Whoever heard of an official ‘Non-Professorial Study Buddy’ before. But it’s in there, and they’re going to hire someone to be it next year, so as you might as well check it out to see if you qualify.”

If they are eligible and apply for a particular job, students are not necessarily guranteed to receive it, but “submitting your top-choices early” and “establishing strong communication links with the business and Student Life offices are known to help you prove your case,” Sophia added.