UPDATE APRIL 28, 2020: Due to the incredible need in America to bypass censors, we’re now self-hosting serious information, this video and will be in the future incorporating a sub-page with real, serious news to eventually be spun off from our local satire stories. For now, this video is the only serious thing on our site, but we’re reconfiguring in real-time to meet the needs of protecting America whom we love as one nation under God!
The real story is that we’re an unofficial news site run by Wyoming Catholic College Sophomores and Seniors of the Classes of 2020 and 2022. We were founded back in October 2018 as an organization kind of “by accident” or philosophically speaking a per accidens result to the collision of two natures. Most of our news is exaggerated, fake, or parodic, but usually is based on some incident or concern we’ve come across in our time as students here at WCC. Some however is based on larger world or church events from our perspective in “God’s country”. We love the school, we love the Church and we love the combination of education we here receive. And most of us (with the possible exception of one writer) don’t listen to or even really know much about metal. MetalMatch doesn’t really work for dating as we say, adoration and the 11:30 Mass are better and more popular times for such discernment.
Thanks for reading,
God bless you and please pray for our school,
Everett L. Polinski
President – Irkutsk Ice Truckers
Contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org
Or Call (307)-206 -5241
But below is a fake account of our existence we could give for one reason or another…
Everett Polinski (our chairman and president – WCC Sophomore)
Founded in October 2018, we are an international syndicate with businesses in many sectors but all guided by the goal of becoming the “bravest metal there is”. We began as an ice-road trucking business from Anchorage to Irkutsk but soon expanded into the entertainment, logistics, publishing, intelligence research, and now our largest venture, news and analysis.
We are headquartered in Irkutsk, Alaska but most of our executives are domiciled in Lander, Wyoming.
We’re a global family of Russian and American metalhead and ice trucking aficionados where our unique roots, unique vision, and unique style of fun give us the ability to offer some seriously unique experiences to our clients.
But we offer much more than just ice trucking and we’re growing by the day. Join our team today by filling out your application at this link
Learn more about our history here
Irkutsk Ice Trucking
Ice Truck Yourself
Irkutsk Ice and Metal Mining
Irkutsk Ice Weddings
and more to come…
Everett Polinski is the founder and C.E.O. of Irkutsk Ice Truckers, chief editor of irkutskicetruckers.com, and a sophomore at Wyoming Catholic College
Ernie Thee Bass is a member of the IIT board of directors and the founder of ETBMugBug and Bros
Sophia Donaldson chairs our intelligence gathering team and is a major contributor to our reporting.
The Wandering Minstrel is Chairman of the IIT board and our Sales Manager
Everard Polinski, Everett’s brother, loves metal just as much or more than Everett and is our Vice-President and Metal Director
S. Ezra Smith is our chief director of wisdom and manager of our e-commerce site buy.irkutskicetruckers.com
The Average Muslim Liturgist is our Chief Faith Correspondent and advisor on all liturgical matters.
Thomas Arnett is our technology director, website manager, and directs our hacking team (just kidding!)
SpoonsMcGee is our news director for all things WCC and a major source of insight for our intelligence gathering branch IIT Investigates
Pako is our chief Business Strategist and consultant on all matters musical
The Baked Potato, and his team (I am not certain if he is actually an actual potato), are our marketing manager and marketing team respectively
We’re hiring: Send your resume to email@example.com or fill out this form
I always knew that only with the power of the bass could one get blasted into the space beyond the heavens… But I was never able to get there until IIT came around. Thanks guys!!!
Find us – We’re Near Wyoming Catholic College