St. George, UT – Reports of violent military confrontation on a certain rock-climbing trip for Wyoming Catholic College’s spring outdoor week are “somewhat overblown” a source within the school’s Outdoor Leadership Program told IIT. Yes, there were some light skirmishes involving a certain spider, several minor incursions of knee space in the car ride, and even an apparent special military operation by one cook group to seize another’s hot sauce, but “things quieted down when National Guard arrived for a peacekeeping intervention,” trip WFR Annalise King told IIT. “I’d say things were ‘mostly peaceful’,” she added.
According to the OLP, the climbing expedition returned safely to Lander this past Saturday, all normal except for a few Army National Guard tanks and Air Force jets trailing them.
Trip participants refused to divulge anything more about exactly what the Guard was called in for, but one IIT analyst stationed in Washington D.C. told us that “it’s all just part of the process, don’t worry about it Jack. I mean come on man. It was probably about someone not wearing a mask or something.”
More students are worried, however, over reports that, for the first time in WCC history, a couple was allowed to go together on two trips in one school year. Details of this concerning incident are still scarce, but what could make it really terrible for the WCC community is that one of the two implicated is reportedly a Canadian.