In the latest controversy to erupt among the freshmen rockers and upperclassmen at WCC is the question of the moral imperative of “dumpster diving”.
|A fellow student rocker caught on camera last night in the hunt for eternal glory
Launched last night by St Athanasius prefect Fay, a movement has begun to achieve fame, glory, and justice along with the personal benefit of nice new pants. As the school official wrote:
Also, the dumpster behind Eagle Uniform Supply is overflowing with practically-brand-new Dickies, jeans, and some Carhartt pants. I scored some really nice jeans out of there this evening. So check it out if you are so inclined.Pax,Pete
So, some freshmen rockers took him up on it in the quest for justice and the artifact “forms” of nice clothes:
Being the poor college student that I am, I did feel inclined to do a bit of gentlemanly “dumpster shopping” earlier this evening. Yet, I hadn’t even popped the lid when a fella across the street came strolling out and threatened to call the cops if I didn’t get off his property. Seems to him that the dumpster was on a privately owned parking lot, and his boss said no-one was allowed to go through his trash. I left respectfully, yet I still doubt that the dumpster was actually on private ground. I did see several excellent pairs of jeans in there, so if any of you feel like you still want to risk it, by all means, go ahead. But watch out for a gentleman with a black beard.
With this risk identified, a sophomore wrote a warning email:
FYI, I highly suggest not hitting this stash right now. The staff of the store do not want us looking through their dumpster, and, unfortunately, they have that right as it is on their property. If too many more groups of us come through, I don’t doubt that they will take more drastic measures to prevent it.
But another sophomore stood his ground for justice:
I’ll see your black beard and raise you a brooding-possibly-Arab face.
While yet another view was added in support of dumpster diving, but rather, in the hotel dumpster:
There might still be some clothes in the hotel dumpster. Thanks Nemec!
Still hoping for the grand prize of brand new Carharts, Leo’s resident Belken investigated the legal ramifications that surround this concept:
I still say that it seems reasonable to go for it, if you’re up for that sort of thing. America throws enough stuff away, if someone’s just sending something to the landfill and you have a use for it, it would be hard to fault you for preventing the waste. This isn’t even being cheap. You could consider such an action to be practical… Responsible, even. If your conscience tells you you can set foot on what is supposedly company property to save perfectly good items, I’m not the one to tell you that you shouldn’t do that. It may be a great moral option. This isn’t to say that it would be legal or that I’m suggesting that you do anything that is questionable in the eyes of the law, but you could see the dumpster situation in the light I’ve proposed. It certainly wouldn’t be stealing, as the company has waived their right to the items in question…
Moved by his stirring words, passions began to arise, for justice, and… for self interest as another prefect Joshua T. Mireles of John’s states:
Belkin is on to something.
Further investigating, Belken found evidence of illegalities in the dumpster’s owner’s themselves, while removing all legal qualms from the actions and hopes of the “fellow student rockers:
Furthermore, I found a rad zoning map.
The main thing to note is that the dumpster appears to be on public property, which should further allay any qualms about trespassing.
Please note the public alleyway that is blocked by the tractor trailers. That’s potentially not legal, incidentally.
Uncovering a zoning map, shown here on the left, Belken proved that not only is it legal to access said clothing supply, but in fact, the men who attempted to frighten off the fellow student rockers of WCC might in fact have been engaging in the horrendous illegality of blocking the public right of way with improperly placed vehicles.
Freshmen rocker Sponseller fully suggests action now, “How can people act in such a horrific way when children are starving in Africa. Justice demands that we take everything we find!”
Irkutsk Ice Truckers officially agrees, and is offering for today only, free ice-truck delivery of any and all items freshmen rockers find in and around Lander.
To learn more about skills involved in this noble quest for justice, visit this website here