Lander, WY – Long term campus improvement plans leaked by an IIT contact within Wyoming Catholic College administration reveal that an elevated high-speed tramway shuttle connecting the college’s buildings downtown with the apartments and dormitories is “already in advanced stages of planning”. 

“Pretty surprising,” according to the official who gave the report to us, the proposed system would run a length just over a mile with four stops between endpoints at the Augur Building and the upper dormitories on each end. Running at up to sixty miles an hour between stops and with capacity for up to thirty students at a time per tram car, and with up to three cars able to run on the system at any time, it would be the quickest way between nearly any two locations on campus, revolutionizing student transportation by saving the average student nearly four hours a week in walking time.

“That’s four extra hours you can use to study, play, exercise, work, or goof-off,” says IIT commentator Anna Draclab, a sophomore at WCC. “I’m living this already.” 

How the school exactly would pay for this system, as well as how much it would actually be used remain open questions, since having the ability to move dozens of students at once, or nearly a thousand an hour seems a little unnecessary given how small WCC is. But according to our source within school administration, current WCC leadership “is extremely set on, and working to fast track the proposal,” with bids to construction and transportation companies for the track and vehicle construction respectively set to go out as soon as this October.

The tram also has proposed stops at the Inn at Lander and the former location of The Forge, as well as extensions to Safeway, the Dziad residence, and the home of school chief financial officer Mr. McNow, which would seem to suggest the school intends to make these officially part of its campus sometime in the future