Lander, WY – Current Wyoming Catholic College senior John Paul Terneus is set to become the school’s youngest professor from next fall, returning immediately after graduation to teach philosophy, Mathematics, and Latin alongside his brother Jacob Terneus. Announced today, the selection was deemed necessary to ensure that the school always retains a “healthy community of board gamers.”
“We’re extremely excited to have John Paul stay on and teach,” says WCC’s dean Professor Cleanut. “As one of the top members of the Class of 2021, he’s extremely qualified to be our first professor hired on and confirmed even before he graduates.” John Paul’s senior oration in the spring will count as his faculty entrance lecture, “which is just a formality” anyway according to Cleanut, while the school is also looking into counting Terneus’ stint as a Math tutor for the “example teaching” requirement.
John Paul will teach mostly alongside his older brother Dr. Jacob Terneus, who visited WCC last week for a more regular faculty admissions lecture. John Paul’s current roommate William, a junior, is also being considered for a position on the Math faculty according to the most recent reports received by IIT.
Concerns abound however, at the school already that John Paul is a direct descendent of the infamous Turnus of Virgil’s Aeneid, something that has sophomore Bernadette Houser of Alaska for one demanding that the school “keep him twenty feet away from any HMN201 class. All those conquer the world board games he plays prove he’s just as set on domination as Turnus ever was,” she added. “Why doesn’t the school leadership notice the obvious Turnus right there in his name? Even we humble sophomores did as much.”