Lander, WY – Approaching the end of the semester at Wyoming Catholic College, a new conspiracy theory is fast growing among students that supposes that Irkutsk Ice Trucker’s president Everett Polinski doesn’t actually exist and IIT is merely the product of the manipulation of 2020 WCC graduate Parker Eidle or “Pako”. “I mean Pako was here for quite awhile,” comments sophomore David Gleason. “He’s obviously the kind of person who’d try and find a way to immortalize himself and remain in the WCC.”
“These rumors are plausible,” says senior Sophia Donaldson. “But not much more than that. Well, maybe only a little bit more. I know Everett personally, very personally,” she said, “and I’m pretty sure he’s not Pako, but you never know. Maybe they think Pako’s looking to break his own record and stay here indefinitely.”
Everett Polinski has commented on the rumors as well, saying that he’s “personally very intrigued by them starting, as I personally don’t think I look much like Pako. If anything I though rumors would be spreading that I’m Ben Bridge or something like that.”
Pako could not be reached by IIT for comment with regard to this theory, something that has Pako is Everett believers even more convinced, but something Everett dismisses the lack of response as “as just like him as talking about Homer.”
“Have I said anything about Homer recently?” he added. “See, I told you I’m not Pako.” However, although Everett has not written about Homer recently, he was seen walking into his room in St. Leo’s Dormitory with “several copies of the Iliad.”
School officials have also not commented on these rumors.