Lander, WY – One of our sources just shared with us the surprising news that the IIT president and current WCC junior Everett Polinski has made it onto the list of approved authors for the school’s Junior Author Project. “Take this with a grain of salt, or a dozen,” says staff investigator and senior Sophia Donaldson. “Everett doesn’t fit all the regular requirements for the project, and this means he could technically study himself as an author, which doesn’t make sense, but if its not true then someone appears to have been an expert forger because the document our source shared looks exactly like the list of approved JLP Authors we received last year.”

Image may contain: text that says 'JAP Authors File Edit View Tools Add-ons Help Accessibility Marcel Proust Gustave Flaubert Professor McCowan Levin Tolstoy Dr. Baxter John Updike Wallace Stevens Cormac McCarthy Shusaku Endo Kazuo Ishiguro Gabriel García Márquez Dr. Holmes Michael Polanyi Jacques Maritain Everett Polinski Professor Hamilton John Muir: "A Summer in the Sierras" Dr. Dziad Josef Pieper John Henry Newman Henry David Thoreau William Faulkner'

Everett Polinski commented that he’s “excited if this is true as it would really make the project so much easier for him if he could write on himself,” and at the same time “prove I’m able to self reflect.” However, he also casts doubt on the authenticity of the source, as he “didn’t see himself on the document earlier in the day.”

“Is this a giant prank? A hoax to lower my ethos and make IIT look like fake news if I or my staff write on it?” Everett asks. “I’d advise people to check in with professors just to make sure before they all scramble to write on me.”

Everett does add that his books, however, are still fun and educational to read even if not read and studied for the JAP project. His most recent book, The Irkutsk Handbook, is available right now on Amazon for only $14.99 or from him directly for only $10.