Lander, WY – In the hopes of spreading our message and work near, far, and farther, we at Irkutsk Ice Truckers are proud to announce today that we have purchased ownership of the “trucker’s hitch” from the National Outdoor Leadership School, which itself purchased the intellectual property to the design in 2015 from the failing “Boy” Scouts of America.
“It was a tough bidding contest,” reports IIT chairman Everett Polinski, “with several other bidders coming even from around Lander, WY.” Pako’s Pawn, long rumored to be closing this year, made a surprise last minute $10 bid amid crowds of organizations who offered less than an a dollar for the rights to this incredibly powerful, versatile, and liberating knot.
Crux Coffee launched the bidding in what is believed to be a proxy bid for the Wyoming Catholic College Outdoor Leadership Program, which to the surprise of many, made no direct bid. Only two individuals made personal bids, Jack and Theo, but after a hectic three hours topped off by the aforementioned Pako’s Pawn and Emporium bid we pulled through with what we believe is a true and honest appraisal of the knot’s value, $12.35.
Though we most definitely wanted the knot, buying it off of NOLS was a hard decision, not wanting, of course, to hand any monetary value at all to the radical NOLSeys. Ultimately, however, the rights to the knot “far outweigh” any value $12.35 will give NOLS as they’ll probably just spend it on alcohol” says IIT board member and WCC Junior Sophia Donaldson.
As owners of the knot, IIT will make it available for anyone and everyone, unlike NOLS which aimed to monetize it with royalty fees. “Its the knot that best fits the ethos we want to project,” continues Everett, “and will help us in our mission to bring the power of metal and ice-trucking to the world.”
As soon as we officially receive ownership of the trucker’s hitch from NOLS, we’ll publish what it is and how to use it to the world from right here on IrkutskIceTruckers.com. We’ll be helping our business by saving costly royalty fees paid every time one of our brave and heavy metal drivers used it and at the same time helping the world to use the one knot that is now “even better than met” (TM).