The Decepticons with their Rabbi Ryan. Notice how enthusiastically he is supported by his followers.

Jackson, WY— Although cults have been many and varied throughout the history of WCC, notably among them the mysterious rituals surrounding John Wayne of Athanasius, new heights were reached this winter trip with the conversion of an entire winter trip group to Judaism and the ordination of their head leader, Ryan Milligan, as Rabbi.

Jacob Zepp, who was MC at the celebration that happened on Tuesday, said: “Even though I don’t believe in the validity of what’s going on, I just had to direct any liturgy that was happening anyway.” Allegedly in an effort to discover their familial relationships with one another while spending time in the Quin-zee, the whole group spontaneously switched religions and came to the trailhead cantillating psalms. 

Rabbi Ryan is predicted to lead his flock in a more liberal direction, given the fact that upon returning to Lander he immediately cut his hair, thus rejecting any possibility of the traditional sidelocks. He has similarly replaced the usual Yamaka with a COR expeditions ballcap and upside-down sunglasses.